Trauma Healing

Another 3am wake up and I’m starting to feel nervous. I’m supposed to have cataract surgery on my right eye today. My medical insurance doesn’t cover laser surgery, so I had to opt for the traditional method. A blade in my eye ball! The thought of it is terrifying.

I’m pretty much settled in my apartment and it feels really nice and comfy and cozy in here. It sounds like I may end up with a roommate. One of my siblings is struggling right now, so a place to stay may be needed for him. Give him time to get his life back in order.

I’m really loving this apartment business. I absolutely love that I don’t have to worry about waking anybody up. I can run around in my underwear if I want to. Well, at least until I get this possible roommate anyway.

I also found another client that works with the company I work for. She is very close in traveling distance, compared to where I’m at now. I’m driving 45-50 miles to work. If I switch clients it’s only about 15-20 miles away. So I put in my two (2) week notice at the place 45-50 miles away and will be starting with this new client in two (2) weeks.

I do have some grief over leaving the other client. I feel horrible about it. I know they’re already short staffed. But that’s a problem everywhere. I have to do what works best for my situation. I probably would’ve stuck it out had I not moved. Where I was before was only, like, 40 miles. But in my new place it’s more like an hour.

I still can’t afford to get much for food, so I run into town for a cup of coffee in the mornings. I need that morning cup.

It is going to be quite tight for me from now on, as long as I’m living on my own. I forgot about all the necessary things you need. And food is one of them. Right now the only thing I can afford is the food shelf, so I made an appointment for that for next week. For now I guess it’s Smack Ramen Soup. The college dorm foods. Food is really no big deal for me. I eat once a day and soup sits in my stomach the best. I did go to the Fare for All in this town. $25 got me a box of meat which consisted of: a package of Chicken thighs, 1lb hamburger, a package of summer sausage, a package of hot dogs and a tenderloin roast. For an extra $7.50 I bought a quiche. And $4.50 got me a package of roasted baby potatoes. The quiche is my main interest right now. But I can’t eat anything until after my surgery.

I know I’m jumping from subject to subject, but I still can’t believe how comfortable I feel in my new home. It’s amazing. I should’ve known to put more trust in God’s plans. The worrying and stress over it was a waste of valuable time. But I’m taking this as a lesson on faith.