Trauma Healing

Personal Experience Healing from Trauma

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Healing from trauma is a lifetime of work and dedication. Hi, my name is Cindy. I have started this blog to be more like a diary. I share my thoughts and experiences and joys so that I may touch just one heart out there. I won’t claim to know it all, as I am not a doctor. But what this is will be my own experience of trauma and recovery. And maybe a friend whom can share their wisdom as well. We are all walking this same journey in life. But all of our paths are different. I believe in oneness. I believe we are connected. Trauma doesn’t have to be huge to be trauma. Just being born can be a traumatic experience. Let’s talk about this and see where it goes.

  • Triple Digits

    Cyng

    Praise Jesus! I pray for peace. Peace in the world. Peace for my family. Peace for my friends. Peace for my enemies. And peace for myself. In Jesus precious name. Amen

    Cyng

    Dear God, I pray for peace. Peace in the world, peace for my family, peace for my friends, peace for my enemies and peace for myself. In Jesus great name I pray. Amen.

    This has been a reoccurring theme for me for about a year now. I just randomly look at the time and see triple digits.

    4:44 is a sign from your angels that you are on the right path and now is a good time to manifest the things you want in life. It’s a sign of angelic guidance, stability and protection.

    The spiritual meaning of 3:33 centers around divine growth and progress. It indicates that you are on the right path in your spiritual journey. Your ascended masters are around you to help you get in alignment with your life purpose.

    These are just short versions of things I’ve read on the spiritual meaning of these numbers.

    Cyng

    Dear God, I pray for peace. Peace for the world. Peace for my family. And peace for my friends. Peace for my family and peace for myself. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

    11:11 has a spiritual meaning behind it. It resembles a spiritual awakening and that you are on the right path.

    Just so people understand, I don’t sit and stare at the clock. This phenomenon has been going on with me for at least six (6) months, if not a year. I just randomly look at the time and it just happens to be those magical numbers.

    I feel God is trying to send me messages through supernatural ways. And I don’t think that’s a bad thing.

    I know I have a lot of enemies. Buy I still pray for them. I pray for peace for everybody. Because I just want everybody to get along.

    Istockphoto.com

    Anyway, it is now early morning. I think I’ve been up since 2am and now it’s 4:30am. I miss summer already. This year has flown right by. I don’t know where I’ve been. But it seems like we just got rid of the cold and now it’s right around the corner again. It’s kind of depressing. I really don’t like winter. I don’t know why I live in a snowy state. I guess I’ve just never been brave enough to just uproot myself. And these days, with society the way it is, I’m too scared to now.

    Cyng

    Dear God, I pray for peace. Peace for everybody in this world. Peace for my family. Peace for my friends. Peace for my enemies. And peace for myself. It’s in your precious name I pray. Amen

    Like I said, I see it everywhere. My life really is content right now. Moving out of my family’s home was, so far, a great transition. And I’ll say it again, I can’t believe how much I’ve conquered my fear.

    It sounds like my brother is leaving on the first of the month. I guess we will see about that. I know he and his girlfriend are planning a trip away. I have no clue when they’ll be back.

  • Praying for Peace

    Cyng

    Seeing the number 3:33 often indicates divine guidance, high consciousness and spiritual assistance from ascended masters. It’s a sign to be more mindful and to lighten up.

    Of course, and my prayer: Dear God. I pray for peace. Peace throughout the world. Peace for my family and friends. Peace for my enemies and peace for myself. In Jesus Holy name. Amen.

    I do not want to wish ill will on anybody. Everybody reaps what they sow. I have no reason to get involved in Gods work. Yes, I do believe God talks to me. I believe he takes care of me. And I believe that everything is happening for the betterment of all involved.

    Istockphoto.com

    I still had a very hard time sleeping last night. I was up several times throughout the night. I finally gave in and made coffee at 5am. I’m trying to figure out what is causing this? It’s really frustrating because it makes me tired all day then and I may end up taking a nap. Then we start the whole problem over again the next night.

    Yes, I still think my apartment is the best. And so far no issues with my brother. It’s actually been kind of nice to have some company for a while.

    I have therapy today at 9am. Of course, I’m not prepared because I can’t find my diary cards. They’ve been packed away somewhere. I still haven’t come across them. I did finally find my tablet. I put it up on the top shelf of my closet, on top of a box full of stuff.

    I truly feel that moving out on my own after five (5+) years of living with my family is probably one of my better decisions I’ve made. I think it was time. And that I’m not feeling any fear about it makes it the greatest. But I was sure feeling a lot of fear prior to the move I was afraid I was making a big mistake. But, now that I’m here I don’t see the big deal about it. Why was I so afraid? I can tell you why. Because the last time I was out on my own I really made a mess of things for myself. But those same issues are not going to happen again. Much more wiser.

  • Another Sleepless Night

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    Day one (1): don’t know what’s going on with my biological clock again. I’m having a hard time sleeping or staying asleep. I woke up at midnight tonight and as the clock displays, it is now almost 3am. I’m tired, but my mind seems to be preoccupied by other things. I’m trying to figure out the best way to help my brother. I’m switching clients again. The drive is just too far for the client I’m currently working with. I found another client with the same company 1/4 of the distance closer.

    Cyng

    I sure love my lights. And it does give me some fond feelings from the last time I was actually on my own. For me, they are comforting. I only use purple. It’s the only color that gives me the feelings I get. Feelings of comfort and home. Relaxing. Just … surreal with meditation music and a candle and some incense.

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    Day two (2): Again, I woke up thinking it was 6 o’clock in the morning and it’s actually only 2:50am. I’ve been awake and up since around 2am. I could’ve sworn the time said 6am on my clock. I got up and made some coffee before realizing how early it really was.

    I’m thankful my brother is a heavy sleeper. I’d hate to feel the same way I did at my daughter and son-in-law’s, feeling like I need to get out of bed in the middle of the night, but no place to go, because I didn’t want to wake anybody up. So far, I haven’t had any issues with my brother. We will see how long it lasts.

    Cyng

    I wanted to show off this drum I made completely by hand about a year ago. I didn’t have any place to hang it before, but hanging it on my wall at my new place, is priceless. It’s made with real deer skin. I had to let the thing completely dry after I put it together. And when I dries it tightens and the deer skin shrinks, making a really nice drum tone once it’s dried completely.

    Istockphoto.com

    I just can’t believe how I let this move worry me for weeks. Projecting the worst case scenario. My faith in God had faltered at that time. Lord, please forgive me for not trusting you and thinking I can drive the bus myself. It’s obvious I don’t have the plan, you do Lord, and I am putting complete faith in you. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

    Istockphoto.com

    I had to postpone DBT until November. With moving and switching clients I just didn’t have time to start this at this moment. But we still go through the diary cards (although I can’t remember where I packed them). I suppose I better try looking for them again. just like I misplaced my iPad. And it doesn’t help to use find my iPad, because I shut that feature off on the tablet. Anyway, I did finally find it on the very top shelf of one of my closets. I don’t remember even putting it there. But I was thankful. It was driving me nuts not being able to find it.

    I really don’t have anything enlightening this morning. It’s now 4am and I’m wondering if I should try taking a nap.

    I’m wondering if I’m going through a mania cycle. Lack of sleep, impulsive spending. Personally, I think I’m just excited to finally have my own place. I feel really good about it. I can make coffee at 4am. Which I did.

  • Dear God

    Cyng

    I pray for peace. Peace for the world. Peace for my family. Peace for my friends. Peace for my enemies. And peace for myself. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

    I’m a bit upset this evening. My brother broke my brand new microwave and now I don’t know what I’m going to do. I don’t have extra money to buy another one. This is probably my own fault. I should’ve showed him how to use it. It’s different than any I’ve ever used before, and I’m sure him as well. But I left the instruction stickers on the dang thing. I thought maybe he would have read them. But then again. I should’ve known better. Men don’t read instructions. I’m trying not to be upset, but it’s coming out more as anxiety. I don’t know when I’m going to be able to get another one and now I don’t know what to do with this broken one.

    Istockphoto.com

    Ha. I was just about to throw this microwave in the dumpster. I got dressed to do it. But I tried it one more time. I took the towel away that was in front of it and gave it another try, coat on and everything. Ha, now it works. Apparently the towel that was sitting in front of it was jarring the door so it wouldn’t shut all the way. I’m feeling pretty foolish right now.

    Cyng

    I’m really digging my new space. I can burn my candles whenever I want. Burn incense whenever I want. There are so many things I can do now that I couldn’t do before. I’m pretty excited about this. I can decorate my own patio area. It’s like living in a huge bedroom with a small kitchen and bathroom. Charming. I love it. And hopefully I can tolerate my “roommate”.

    Cyng

    Dear Almighty God, I pray for peace for the world. Peace for my family. Peace for my friends. Peace for my enemies. And peace for myself. In Jesus name I pray.

  • Room Remodel

    Cyng

    I put strip lights along the ceiling of my apartment and I think it is so beautiful. It displays all colors, but I have a preference to purple, so that’s where it stays.

    I am so happy to have my own place. Well, not alone anymore. My brother is staying with me now. Feels like a tight fit, but we’re making it work. I sure am glad I picked up a twin mattress from facebook marketplace. It even came with a platform.

    But now my house feels really cluttered. I’m not sure how to solve the problem, except put the rest of my clothes away that are in a basket.

    I’m thinking about getting a couple outfits for my brother. He has nothing for clothes here and I don’t know when his gf is even going to bring what he has. I’m a poor person in a giving mood.

    Cyng

    I’m still very bitter towards my youngest sister and my mother. The way they have used and taken advantage of my brother still has my head boiling. But I’m going to try and help my brother get a mental health case worker to help him find some services.

    Istockphoto.com

    Lastly, I think I’m growing a crush on someone. But it’s hard to tell, because we really haven’t spent that much time alone together. Now that I have a roommate it’s a little embarrassing for me to get too close to my new friend. But I do know I like him enough. He’s different than most men I’ve dated. And I’ve never dated a Capricorn. So we’re going to see how this goes.

    The biggest issue with me is trust. And though I strongly feel this man would never intentionally hurt me, it’s the body that keeps the score. When we are affectionate it feels suffocating at times. I just don’t trust him yet. And it has nothing to do with anything he’s done. It’s just me, and my past. Some actions are just really triggering.

  • There it is Again

    Cyng

    I didn’t get a chance to post this one a few days ago. What is up with all these random numbers? What does it mean? I always ask myself that, and wonder why…..?

    Googling 10:10 tells me this number is about endings and beginnings and personal growth. It also relates to having a spiritual awakening.

    Of course I said my prayer: Dear God. Please give peace to everybody in the world. Peace for my family. Peace for my friends. Peace for my enemies and peace for myself. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

    I really need prayers for this anger and resentment I have towards my youngest sister right now. My brother sold off all of his property a few years ago when he was having mental health issues, paid off the mortgage on the house with the money he got from selling his other properties off and then turned around and GAVE the property with the house on it to my sister for free, let me repeat. FOR FREE. And now she’s kicking him out of there. That is not right, and in my eyes that is financial exploitation of a vulnerable adult. My brother was in a very vulnerable state when he signed that property over to my sister and my sister took advantage of his condition. I filed a report, but was told nothing was going to be done about it. So, I called to ask why? I’m waiting for a call back from my county agency. In the meantime it sounds like he may be staying with me. All I can do at this time is pray. And have faith that everything is going to work out. She will get her turn with karma.

    Some of my family is such a mess. Some family meaning my mother and my youngest sister. This is not a racist comment, but I know she got pregnant on purpose to trap her new, now husband. And I’m not even sure if he’s legally allowed in the country. But I sure found it ironic that they ran off and got married as soon as Trump was elected into office. But I don’t want to start any rumors. I don’t know anything about it for a fact. I’ve just been getting bits and pieces from other family members. I personally do not associate with my youngest sister. And since my mother is living there with her I don’t associate with my mother either. I’ve already concluded that if/when she passes I will not go to the funeral. I will go visit her on my own time at the grave. This may sound like a terrible thing, but if you knew my family you wouldn’t be surprised. The only reason my youngest sister is allowing my brother’s gf to stay there is because they want to use her to do things for them. That’s it, that’s all in a nutshell.

  • It Happened Again. Twice Today

    Cyng

    Gods grace is everywhere. Dear God: I pray for peace for the whole world. I pray for peace for my family. I pray for peace for my friends. I pray for peace for my enemies. And I pray for peace for myself. It’s in Jesus name I pray. Amen

    Cyng

    Dear God, I pray for peace for everybody in the world. Peace for my family. Peace for my friends. Peace for my enemies. And peace for myself. I pray, in Jesus name. Amen

    Yes, it is true, I saw these both today. I actually saw 10;10 when I was driving as well, so I couldn’t get a picture of it.

    I truly believe God sends us messages. Whether we are doing good or bad. My intentions are pure. I never want to purposely hurt anyone. I actually have quite an interest in people. As an observer. I can feel things about people that they don’t even know about themselves. That’s why I have so few friends. I might point something out, not as a judgment, but as an observation, and I get myself into trouble.

    Cyng

    My cataract surgery went just fine. I wasn’t even aware, in and out in no time. But boy did my eye feel like it had been severely poked. It’s just now taming down to a dull roar. And I have a headache from the anesthesia.

    I learned something interesting at my appointment today, and I’m actually quite….. embarrassed (?). I have cataract surgery scheduled for the other eye on the 27th …. And I didn’t even know there was a cataract in it 🤔. He didn’t tell me about that one before. Either that or I wasn’t listening.

  • Feeling a Little Fear

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    Another 3am wake up and I’m starting to feel nervous. I’m supposed to have cataract surgery on my right eye today. My medical insurance doesn’t cover laser surgery, so I had to opt for the traditional method. A blade in my eye ball! The thought of it is terrifying.

    I’m pretty much settled in my apartment and it feels really nice and comfy and cozy in here. It sounds like I may end up with a roommate. One of my siblings is struggling right now, so a place to stay may be needed for him. Give him time to get his life back in order.

    I’m really loving this apartment business. I absolutely love that I don’t have to worry about waking anybody up. I can run around in my underwear if I want to. Well, at least until I get this possible roommate anyway.

    I also found another client that works with the company I work for. She is very close in traveling distance, compared to where I’m at now. I’m driving 45-50 miles to work. If I switch clients it’s only about 15-20 miles away. So I put in my two (2) week notice at the place 45-50 miles away and will be starting with this new client in two (2) weeks.

    I do have some grief over leaving the other client. I feel horrible about it. I know they’re already short staffed. But that’s a problem everywhere. I have to do what works best for my situation. I probably would’ve stuck it out had I not moved. Where I was before was only, like, 40 miles. But in my new place it’s more like an hour.

    I still can’t afford to get much for food, so I run into town for a cup of coffee in the mornings. I need that morning cup.

    It is going to be quite tight for me from now on, as long as I’m living on my own. I forgot about all the necessary things you need. And food is one of them. Right now the only thing I can afford is the food shelf, so I made an appointment for that for next week. For now I guess it’s Smack Ramen Soup. The college dorm foods. Food is really no big deal for me. I eat once a day and soup sits in my stomach the best. I did go to the Fare for All in this town. $25 got me a box of meat which consisted of: a package of Chicken thighs, 1lb hamburger, a package of summer sausage, a package of hot dogs and a tenderloin roast. For an extra $7.50 I bought a quiche. And $4.50 got me a package of roasted baby potatoes. The quiche is my main interest right now. But I can’t eat anything until after my surgery.

    I know I’m jumping from subject to subject, but I still can’t believe how comfortable I feel in my new home. It’s amazing. I should’ve known to put more trust in God’s plans. The worrying and stress over it was a waste of valuable time. But I’m taking this as a lesson on faith.

  • Exhausted But Happy

    Istockphoto.com

    No, the woman in the picture is not me, but I guarantee that’s how I’m feeling this morning. Absolutely exhausted and my body just aches. I didn’t go to bed till probably 10:00 o’clock last night and I was up at 3am working on my apartment. Setting stuff up and putting stuff away and washing dishes I had stored.

    These past few days have just been hectic. I don’t think my body has moved this much in five (5) years. Being with my daughter and son-in-law I pretty much stuck to my bedroom. Now I have all this space and easy access to the kitchen and bathroom without fear of waking someone up.

    What I really like about this place is it’s all ground level apartments, so there’s nobody walking on top of me and I don’t have to worry about walking above anybody myself.

    But boy does my body ache this morning. I’m sure it’s from trying to carry heavy boxes out of storage. I had to ask myself Who packed these boxes so heavy?! I know it wasn’t me.

    I had to ask a friend of mine who helped pack when I moved. I don’t believe I packed boxes that heavy. I couldn’t even carry them. I couldn’t even lift them out of storage. But my great God came to the rescue. He sent my brother-in-law down to check on me. I was so thankful, cause I was thinking as I was trying to move these boxes Why didn’t I ask for help? But lo and behold help showed up. My brother-in-law got the two heavy boxes out and put them in my car. We then went to my apartment so he could help me get them in the house, then I ran him back home. He is such a compassionate man.

    I’m pretty sure I hurt my back trying to get those boxes out. My back, my legs, my whole body feels just wrecked. And I’ve got more to finish up today. Hopefully it’s the last day anyway. I know I still have stuff at my daughter’s I’ll have to get and clean that room eventually. But the most important stuff is done and I feel pretty good about that.

  • New Home Alter

    Cyng

    Today is my first day off for the next six (6) days. I really feel accomplished this morning. I woke up at 3am and went right to work on unpacking. I washed a lot of dishes already this morning. I’m pretty proud of myself for being so productive.

    The picture above is the alter I built in my new home. The stones on the bottom are Amethyst and Rose Quartz. Amethyst has a lot of meaning to it, but most importantly, it is a good stone for empaths. It’s known as a vital stone for experiencing a spiritual awakening. The are several purposes or meanings for it.

    Rose Quartz is all about love and compassion. Love for everybody, including self love.

    I picked four (4) random spheres out of my box and put them on my alter. I have Bloodstone, Orca Agate, Polychrome Jasper and Fluorite. Each of the spheres have their own meanings as well. I picked the out randomly of the fifty (50+) spheres I have (at one point I started giving them away to people as I saw fit. But so far that’s only been two (2) people, so I’m down to fifty (50).

    I’ll give you a little bit of meaning for each stone:

    Bloodstone- known for strength, protection, courage, confidence, purification, cleansing

    Orca Agate- The Orca agate has many symbolic meanings. Transformation, spiritual awakening, calming and patience, grounding, balance, good for meditation. The list is endless.

    Polychrome Jasper- Another busy stone, it aids in opportunity, motivation, meditation, knowledge, intuition, inner peace, inspiration, truth, trust. Again, an endless list.

    The last stone on my alter is Rainbow Fluorite. Again, this stone also has several meanings behind it and I’ll just list a few: known as the “genius” stone, it’s connected to mysticism. Clears mental fog, stops mental spirals, encourages mental harmony, creates a sense of calm, addresses stress related issues.

    All of these stones can be googled if you would like more in depth information on any of these spheres or my stones on the bottom shelf. I’m thinking about adding a couple more spheres on the bottom, but I just haven’t thought of the ones I’d like to place there. I kinda like my alter just the way it is.

    And if you’re wondering how I picked out four (4) spheres of fifty (50), all I did was go with my intuition, picked the four (4), then during my meditation practice I looked their meanings up and found all of them to be fitting for what I’m going through right now. Especially during this super full moon.

    Taken off Facebook

    They say your intuition increases during super full moons. I know my intuition is more powerful during this time.

  • Am I Giving My Heart Away?

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    I do have one “friend” that I know reads my blog pretty regularly. So, if he’s reading, then this one is for him.

    This man is slowly stealing my heart. I like him. I can’t wait to spend more time getting to know him. He has lots of stories to tell. He’s a pretty quiet and reserved kind of man around other people, but when we kiss I definitely feel his passion. He’s a Capricorn to a T. His personality depicts it. I think we could have some interesting yet serious discussions about lots of things.

    I just feel like I haven’t spent enough time with him yet to really get involved. And for all I know he’s probably got several women on the hook (I can hear him laughing about this again like he did last night when I said that to him).

    What I like the most about him in the present moment is he is not too clingy. He doesn’t demand a ton of my attention and he tends to always find something to do without involving me. I’m very much an introvert so getting me out of the house can be like pulling teeth sometimes. But I like spending time with him.

    I won’t say any more about it, for now. I don’t want to overwhelm him if he reads this.

  • My Day Just Keeps Getting Better

    Cyng

    Here we have another double digit that I just happened to look at my phone and see.

    12:12 is often a message of encouragement and support from your angel guides. It’s signaling that you are on the right path for spiritual growth and new beginnings. It’s a reminder to stay positive and trust what is happening.

    I’ve been seeing double/triple digits for quite some time just randomly looking at my phone to use it for something and I run across these often.

    I believe in numerology and angel numbers. And that certain numbers mean things. I never used to believe in any of this kind of stuff until I got involved in some of the new age business. Which I know most Christian’s balk at me and my beliefs. I don’t care. I feel pleasant feelings from some of this new found stuff.

    Though I know in the Bible that to be a Christian means taking up your cross and following Jesus. God said in this world we will have troubles, being a Christian. But it’s almost like, if you’re not miserable than you’re not a Christian. Throwing old stuff away. Well…. I’ve got plenty of questions regarding this. What’s wrong with feeling positive from day to day instead of always carrying these heavy burdens? I am a believer in God, Jesus and the Bible. But my beliefs are probably not agreed upon, because I have so many beliefs beyond that. I don’t believe God wants us to be miserable in this world. I believe he wants us each to find some comfort in this world, as we follow Him.

    Like I said, I have so many questions about, not just Christianity, but other religions as well. Like, what makes the Christian religion right and the rest wrong? I personally feel culture determines faith. Every religion seems to have one important person, just like Christianity has Jesus, other religions have somebody.

    The only right is known by God. I think we all should pay more attention to our own sins and quit pointing fingers at other sinners. We all sin and the wages of sin is death.

  • Change

    Cyng

    I think the meaning of this number is change. There are great changes coming your way.

    Seeing the numbers 5:55 is interpreted as a message from the universe or spiritual guides that you are embarking on significant changes in your life. Which I am. Major positive changes are happening or are about to happen and that change should be embraced.

    It all makes perfect sense. I have a lot of good changes right now with moving and changing clients. It doesn’t get much clearer than that.

    What really amazes me is I was having so much anxiety, fear, overwhelm and overthinking over all these changes, but they have really become quite positive. I feel pretty comfortable and confident in my decisions.

    I need to start thinking positively rather than negatively about things, God’s got my back and he won’t give me more than I can handle. And if it’s something I can’t handle he finds a way out for me. This is biblical. Somewhere in 1 Corinthians I believe. It refers to sin, but I see it referring to many situations.

  • And the Moving Has Begun

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    Just an update on the move. It’s actually been going quite smoothly, even through me working. My bedroom is almost empty. My family stepped up and helped. I so much appreciated it. I was able to sleep in my new apartment the first night, thanks to my family helping while I was working.

    I have to say that my first night there was amazing! It felt so good to walk around my place in the middle of the night without worrying about waking people up. I could dig in my own fridge (even though it’s pretty empty right now). But it’s just been great the past couple nights coming home to my apartment. I can’t believe I was stressing so much over it for what? For nothing. I have to say that I feel pretty good about it now.

    So far I’ve talked to one person since I’ve been there. I had noticed him parking really close to me on two occasions. I had the feeling that I had taken his parking spot and felt maybe the close parking was to put me on notice. But when I parked last night he again parked up really close to me. So when he got out of his truck I asked him if I had taken his parking spot. He said not really. There are no assigned parking spaces for apartments in the back, so you just have to find a spot and the spot I took was the spot he used to park. But he said it didn’t matter to him, it makes no difference in distance.

  • Could This Be The End?

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    I’m thinking about ending my blog. I don’t know, but for some reason it has become a triggering issue for me. All those bad things that happened to me 6/7 years ago started with a blog I had started. I’m afraid it’s going to happen again. I also remember it was this same time of year when I moved and started the blog. Then all that bad stuff started happening.

    I feel like an angel with broken wings after a tremendous battle with Satan. But I am recovering, finally. Five years later. Every church I’ve tried I don’t feel like I belong, so I made my own church. Temporarily. And that’s biblical. I just feel like I’ve been through more than most people. Though I know everybody has their own struggles. I don’t dwell on it like I used to, so that’s a blessing. But it still affects my life in small and big ways. I still talk about it from time to time. I think I’m lying to myself. I Maybe talk about it more than I realize.

    The lack of interest in a relationship is due to that old mess. And my mental health. I just don’t have the energy to put forth in a relationship. Or, maybe I just haven’t found the one that I want to make an effort for.

    Lately, when I think about posting something I start to get paranoid. I’m afraid people will know too much about me and mess with my head again.

    It’s just strange that I moved and started a blog again, at the same time of year (October).